Friday, July 31, 2009

The Sidewalk Sale: My Last Pathetic Pitch!

OK, first of all, I'll remind you that the Rivoli's great Sidewalk Sale 2 is happening this weekend, 8-2 both on Saturday and Sunday. And in case you've just stumbled onto this blog by accident and have no idea what it's about, the Rivoli
Apartments is located at 2nd & Blanchard, Belltown neighborhood, Seattle, Washington, United States, Northern Hemisphere, Earth.

Here's what to expect (from me, at least):

See this? It's a milk crate full of 78s. I'll have six or seven of these. I pretty sure I have around 800 to sell.

Here are a few rows of LPs just chillin' in my hallway. I should have around 300 of these for sale. I'll have CDs, too, but only a few dozen. However, I will be selling copies of my curious magnum opus, Mackris v. O'Reilly. A double CD of the whole dang thing will cost you $5. And if that wasn't enough, I'll also be selling Mackris v. O'Reilly t-shirts for three bucks apiece, two for five bucks.

This is all very well and good, but the bad art is the star of the show. After eight years of languishing in the boiler room, I'm putting almost everything up for sale. I'll have over 50 pieces. Here are a few:

One of the larger velvets; this is a very spindly and apparently drunk Don Quixote riding the path of heroes without Sancho Panza.

Giant sea captain's head looming over the horizon; the boy in the rowboat tries to paddle away in terror, but the boat isn't anywhere near water. Score one for the giant sea captain's head.

I call this one Castle of Erotic Misunderstandings.

A pronghorn antelope in repose.

A sad clown with a tragically large bow tie.

Red Moses...

Pup 'n' Brew...

Um, Arm. And this is the crown jewel of the collection. Ladies and gentlemen, The Devil Children:

Just note that this is the only piece of bad art NOT for sale. Everything else is priced to move, but The Devil Children stays right here. It will, however, be on display for all to admire.

So that's just a preview of what I'm selling. Besides me, there will be a few others with treasures to proffer. See you there.

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